There is an inherant contradiction in Energy Mirrors. Not for the client, but for me as a facilitator, even when (or perhaps especially when) I am my own client. It goes like this:
Judge the work by how effective it is. If your client isn’t changing within 3-4 sessions, then you’re missing something really important. BUT, let go of the need for a specific outcome. If you’re so focused on something changing, then you’re likely to miss something key.
In short…pay attention to what changes and shifts, but don’t focus on it. Otherwise, it’s too easy to limit or miss the very thing that will create the change you want. Well, that’s great! And I understand it–in theory. In practice it’s a hell of a lot harder.
We’ll start with the work I’m doing. I want to lose weight. There’s a whole 2 day class on weight loss and there’s no way I can into all the specifics here. But let me say that possibilities of weight loss through energy work is…well, it’s vital, it’s key, it’s that missing piece that might be the whole pie. Or so I believe. I promise, I’ll do a whole blog on weight loss later. (It might help if someone begs me to do it).
Anyway, I’ve done so many sessions on “losing adipose tissue (fat)” or simply “weight loss”, that I’ve lost count. I would conservatively guess 20 sessions, but probably more. I mean, I’ve been adding that to my frames for the last two years. Then I decided, hell, it’s time to pull in help. I asked about sessions from CEM facilitators (Certified Energy Mirrors facilitators). The sessions cost $75 per and a course like this could easily run 3-4 sessions or a lot more. Not a small amount of change, but I’m willing to do it if it will shed some pounds.
I ended up emailing with one of the energy mirrors employees whom I’ve become acquianted with. I believe she’s a CEM facilitator, too, but I’m not positive. Anyway, her advice was long and helpful, but it ended up that I should try doing a session on: LETTING GO OF THE NEED FOR A SPECIFIC OUTCOME.
Great. I need to lose weight or buy new clothes. Those are the two options right now. I could diet. Yeah, I’ve done that before and it was a great deal of effort. I know, I know, how much effort does it take to NOT eat. A LOT. But I’ve done it. I’ve gone on 700 calories a day diets that work. I lose weight…and a whole lot of sanity. I just don’t feel like I have the focus or energy for that right now. So I’m hoping for that quick fix. Oh, and have you noticed how I wandered right away from Letting Go to but I need this result? Yeah, I did to.
So I did the session last night. And btw, it’s not finished. I had to stop it in the middle because it went on too long, I was losing focus, and it was time to stop. Will have to pick it up again later this morning. But for the moment, the session I did took me straight to a Collective Conscious of Achievement.
What does that mean? It means (I believe) my intrinsic-to-my-very-cells need to accomplish/achieve. It means I’m goal-oriented. I set a goal–no matter how reasonable or logical–and my self-esteem is effected if I fail in it. It is IMO exactly how I am able to function in a job like being a novelist. Without that goal-setting and an internal drive to achieve it…I wonder if I’ll ever get anything done again.
Now–in theory–disconnecting from that acheivement-oriented harmonic doesn’t mean I’ll never get anything done. It simply means I can chose to be goal-oriented or not. After all, does it really help me if I set a goal of finishing a soduku puzzle? I have set that goal. Not consciously, but I notice that my self-esteem suffers if I put it down unsolved. Can you say neurotic?
So it would really cool if I could separate from that. Also, it might be really cool if I could separate body image from self-esteem. And, you know, there’s a never-evending list of goals out there. Some might argue that living from goal to goal is a straight road right to No Self Esteem because I can never measure up, I can never complete my tasks, I can never rest. That would be goal-setting run amuck, and yeah, I’ve been there.
So I did the session. I’m terrified that I’ll suddenly not feel like finishing my current novel. I’m also trying really hard not to look at my weight. As in: I’ve let go fo the need for a specific outcome, have I lost weight yet? I’ve finally found a workable kind of living in my goal-setting. If my self-esteem suffers because I put down that sodoku, then lucky me, I have time tomorrow to lift myself back up again. But that’s management of a neurosis, not freedom from it.
So that’s where I am. Wish me luck…